Perhaps I'm being too hard on myself but the following sentence popped into my head while I was showering today - One day I hope to be a fully functioning member of the human community capable of an intimate relationship with another human being rather than a debased psuedo-intellectual who fucks for sport and objectifies young, 'exotic' men...
All this on the heels of a text message marriage proposal (my second to date!)from a young Indian guy I was dating in order to get his green card, getting hit on by a black cop in my neighborhood (as opposed to being eyed suspiciously or stopped and frisked)and setting up a date with a sexy young Dominican guy who works at the deli across from the YMCA. Oh lord, here we go again, it never ends!
I used to engage in this behavior mindlessly, gluttonously, addictively. But now thanks to a combination of maturity (sort of), psychotherapy and studying Sociology - I am beginning to wonder exactly what-the-fuck is going on here.
